**Warning** A lot of explicit language and sexual content in this chapter. This is intended for a mature audience and should not be read by anyone who couldn’t watch a rated R movie. If your mama wouldn’t like it, you shouldn’t read it. **Warning**
Boy did I get an earful when I finally woke up after Penelope left. Danny was leaving for work when he ran into Pen leaving my bedroom in a state of undress. Now he knows how I felt running into Kesha. Except I like Kesha and Dan hates Penelope.
“What the hell were you thinking, Mick!?”
“I wasn’t, obviously.”
“No shit! Penelope Junkett! Could you have brought home a bigger witch into our house? She’s nothing but trouble, brother. Nothing but trouble.”
Danny was getting so upset that I was becoming amused. “But she has great tits, right? Smokin’ hot.”
Dan just threw up his hands in disgust leaving me chuckling to myself. But then I sobered. No matter how hot she was, Danny was absolutely right that Penelope’d be nothing but trouble.
The thing is that I don’t learn from my mistakes, if you haven’t figured that out already. I met up with Pen a few nights later. I was sober enough that time that I made the conscious decision to bring her home with me. She was a good fuck, I’ll say that for her. She knew how to use her smokin’ hot tits and legs and everything else.
Maybe I should have stayed away from her, but what can I say? I’m a guy. We don’t always make decisions with our brains.
Of course I paid for not thinking with my brain. Penelope pretty much went out of her way to strut around proclaiming that we were an item. She made sure that Lakesha knew that we were sleeping together. ‘Kesha, for her part, put Pen in her place. She no longer had any interest in me and made sure that she thought Pen was pathetic to brag about sleeping around.
I heard about the incident from both Penelope and my brother. Danny just told me to keep my skank whore of a girl friend away from his fiancé. Penelope told me that ‘Kesha was a bitch and that I should kick her and my brother out of my house before their “brat” was born.
Instead, I kicked Penelope out of the house. I told her that she couldn’t talk about my niece or nephew like that.
“While you’re a good lay, Pen, I don’t need to put up with your shit. Don’t worry about coming back here. I won’t be inviting you. And don’t do me any favors if you see me drunk in a bar again. I’d rather pass out on the corner than go anywhere with you.”
“You can’t speak to me like that!”
“I think I just did. Get out, Penelope.”
“You’ll pay for this, Mickey Fields! And you’re a lousy lover!”
Penelope stormed out of the house after she gathered up her clothes. I wasn’t worried about her threat, and I knew that she was wrong about what sort of lover I was. I made her scream in bed—more than once. She could deny it all she wanted. I was a great lover!
Well, Danny and Lakesha decided to get married at the courthouse before their baby was born. They had planned to wait, but both got impatient and couldn’t go through with it.
Meanwhile, I moved on with my life. I was still performing with Rhonda and Sherona. We’d all gotten over the loss of Virginia to the band. After one of our gigs, I was sitting down at the bar eating some hot-wings when I saw a girl talking to the bartender. I listened to them as I finished my wings, but when she wandered off to the dance floor, I followed and offered her a drink.
“I’m Mickey,” I said. I probably could have given a better pick up line, but I’ve found that keeping it simple is often best.
“I’m Caitlyn,” she smiled at me, and I told her it was nice to meet her. She accepted the drink and we continued to talk and flirt.
When the bartender eventually kicked us out, we were laughing like old friends. I found that Caitlyn as a great dancer and she could kiss like a goddess. Of course I invited her back to my place.
After making out in my parlor for a bit, managing to get to second base and wanting to get a lot farther, I whispered a pretty naughty suggestion in Caitlyn’s ear.
She pulled back from me, shocked. “Mick! I don’t know…I don’t usually…not on the first date…” she stammered.
“Don’t worry then,” I gave her a lascivious smile. “This isn’t a first date.” She smiled at that and I knew I had scored.
Boy did I ever! Who knew she had such skimpy lingerie on under her plain little jean skirt?! And for all her protests, our clothes are off almost before we hit the bedroom. She was a bit of a tease, but I liked that about her. By the time I got up the next morning, Caitlyn was gone.
I was disappointed, hoping for a little morning wake up call. But she left a present on the pillow next to me…her skimpy, purple thong. Damn that girl was hot! To hell with Penelope. Caitlyn was all I could think about. She had a body that could make a man praise god and weep at the same time. I knew I’d be seeing her again.
Unfortunately, my plans to see Caitlyn again, were put on hold. Penelope got her revenge on me after all. I picked up the phone without looking at the caller ID, and when I heard her voice, my first reaction was to immediately hang up on her.
But then she called right back. “Mickey, don’t hang up! I’m pregnant!” she shouted when I answered the phone the second time. My finger froze over the END button on my phone.
“Mick…Mickey…did you hear me?” I nodded, which she couldn’t see, of course. Then I managed to stammer out some sort of reply.
“Look, meet me at the Prospero Room. We need to talk about this.”
Well fuck. Of course I had to meet her. When I saw her, I just stared. Then I said what any guy in my position would say: “Are you sure it’s mine?”
“Of course I’m sure.” Penelope glared at me. “I haven’t been with anyone but you since we were together.”
“What about before?”
Her eyes narrowed. “I don’t sleep around Mickey. I wanted you, so I wasn’t with anyone else. It’s yours. I’ll get a DNA test if you really doubt me.”
She was serious, so I had to believe her. Why would she lie if she was willing to go to such measures to prove it.
When she knew I had accepted her news, Penelope turned on the charm.
“Mickey, this isn’t such a bad thing.” She came close and put one hand on my arm and the other on my neck, sort of like a hug. She gave me her flirty smile. “We’re good together. We’ll make this work.”
“Make what work?”
“Come up and eat with me. We’ll talk about everything and figure it all out.”
I followed her to the elevator and we rode up in silence. She didn’t lay out her plans until we were seated on the balcony and our appetizers had been served.
“We’ll just have to get married,” she began and I choked on my shrimp.
“The hell we will!”
“Mickey. Be reasonable. We both have reputations to uphold.”
“Musicians have babies out of wedlock all the time. I’m a rebel. I don’t give a crap about my reputation…and that’s what people like about me.”
Penelope looked exasperated. “Well I care what people think. I’m an actress. This is going to be bad enough for me. People’s impressions are very important and being an unwed mother makes me look like a slut.”
I cocked an eyebrow which infuriated Penelope. Any pretense at being friends or lovers or whatever Penelope had been trying was now gone. “I don’t sleep around, you prick! I slept with you! And now I’m pregnant and this is all your fault. You’ll have to fix it. And that means marriage.”
Like hell I would marry Penelope. If I ever got married, I wanted to marry a nice girl, not a harpy. “No. I don’t have to fix anything. I’ll give you child support. I’ll pay for a fucking abortion! I will not marry you!”
I scooted my chair away from the table. “I’m not going to be with you again. Get over it Penelope. You just send me whatever bill you want me to pay.”
I left without looking back, but the echo of Penelope’s “Fuck you, Mickey Fields,” rang in my ears the entire way home.
I didn’t tell anyone about Penelope’s pregnancy. I didn’t want to think about it or the consequences of it. But I should have known that I couldn’t keep it hidden forever. She’s the one who let everyone know. She came over to the house when I was out and spoke to Danny.
Danny wasn’t happy when he told me about her visit. “Well you’ve really fucked up this time, Mick. Jesus. Penelope was here and she is obviously pregnant.”
“Fuck,” I mumbled and started to explain, but he interrupted me. “I asked her if she was carrying the spawn of Satan and she said ‘yeah, it’s your brother’s’. What the hell, Mickey!? Didn’t you learn anything about protection?”
“Like you should talk! You and Kesha are having a 7 month baby.”
“But I love Kesha. That’s the difference. I married her.”
“What do you want me to do? Marry Penelope?”
“Hell no!” Danny actually shuddered. “And I don’t think she’ll have you anyway.”
“But she did give me a message for you.” I raised an eyebrow. “She said to tell you that she decided to have the baby. She is going away so no one will know about it. But after the baby is born, you get to raise it. She said it is all yours.”
“What am I supposed to do with a baby?”
“Be a dad.”
Of course I didn’t become a dad first. Danny and Lakesha had their baby before Penelope’s. After her water broke, Lakesha and Danny hurried to the hospital. Several hours later they returned with my niece, Hannah Fields.
We remodeled our sisters’ room for her, so I was really hoping that Penelope had a girl. It was the only room available for a nursery.
On the day of Hannah’s birthday, Penelope’s threat to leave me with our kid finally materialized. I’d actually begun to think that she might have been bluffing. But I was wrong.
Danny and Lakesha didn’t hold a party for Hannah on her birthday. Sherona, Rhonda and I had a gig, so we couldn’t have been there anyway.
In fact, I wasn’t even there when Penelope dropped off the baby. Danny met Pen at the door. He said she didn’t say anything when she shoved the baby at him. Then she handed him the papers that released all custody to me.
“Tell your brother that I hope he rots in hell,” Penelope’s last words were.
So now I’m forced to be a dad. Great. And I didn’t even get to name her. Penelope gave her the name Jeri Junkett on her birth certificate. Of course I had her last name changed to Fields, but I kept Jeri as a first name. Poor thing. I hope she forgives me for being a fuck up dad, and I hope she doesn’t feel like it was her fault that her mom is a complete psycho.
As for me and Caitlyn getting together again, that’s a complete bust. She found out that I was now a dad, and it didn’t go over that well.
Jeri was crying and I needed to go in and find out what was wrong. “It doesn’t change who I am,” I tried to explain to Caitlyn before going into the girls’ room. But she wouldn’t listen.
She said, “Yeah, actually, it does. I’m not ready to be anyone’s mom. I don’t think we can date anymore.”
While I went in to change my daughter and snuggle her before putting her to bed, Caitlyn went downstairs. I heard the front door open and shut. Damn it.
I’m not going to lie. I was pretty disappointed that things with Caitlyn didn’t work out. I wasn’t hoping she’d be Jeri’s new mother, but I did want to continue being with her. I still had her thong tucked away in a drawer in my room. I’d never get to see her wearing it ever again.
And worse, I had a feeling that Jeri’s presence in my life would prevent me from seeing any woman’s thong. What sort of single woman would want to be with a man who is raising an infant daughter from a different woman that he used to fuck just because she was hot and not because she was a nice person?
As I drank what was to be one of many drinks that night, I mourned my sex life.
And after my pity party, I passed out.